Because of what I do, I’m hyper aware of trends, behaviors, and habits in the happy living arena. I pay close attention to what works and doesn’t work for people, and especially what stops people from living life on their terms.
(My approach removes these obstacles, but I gotta know what we’re up against, dig?)
I’ve identified two main personalities that struggle more than most and I work very hard to get these people (if, you know, I’m working with them….) back on track as quickly as possible…
Here are the two:
Sideliners and Backburners.
Sideliners: people who have very clear ideas of what everyone else should be doing. They ‘yell from the sidelines.’ Sideliners are big on dropping unsolicited comments (social media for sure, but in person as well).
On occasion, I’d get a negative comment on one of my videos letting me know what I did wrong and should’ve done to make it better. Just to see, a few times I went to the commenter’s channel to check out one of their videos only to find that nearly 100% of the time they had none.
In other words, they were sideliners.
Sideliners, without being asked, say things like:
“Here’s what you should do (but I don’t or can’t do better).”
“You should eat more [insert something about protein].”
“You should’ve done [insert opinion] to your novel/song/video.”
Why? because it’s way easier to criticize someone else than to do anything yourself, no?
Just one hitch?
Happiness isn’t about what’s easy.
Doing it yourself makes you happy.
Criticizing someone else and not doing it yourself makes you unhappy.
If you have strong opinions on how a novel could’ve been better, write your own.
If you have strong opinions of how a song could be better, write your own.
Backburners: people who put their own health and happiness on the back burner.
Backburners say things like:
“I’m so busy taking care of everyone else, I have nothing left for myself.”
“Once I get a better job, I’ll eat better, go to the gym, and stop drinking so much.”
“I don’t have the time or energy to write a play. I’ll do it once the kids are out of the house.”
Backburners know what they want, and what they could do to be happy and healthy. Problem is they put everything on the back burner.
A NOTE TO SIDELINERS AND BACKBURNERS:
You’re too important to live this way.
If you don’t believe me, ask your family and friends.
Ask them if they want you to live the best life you can.
Ask them if they think you are valuable to the world.
Ask them if they think you’re capable of doing stuff.
Get in the game.